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Somerville Dog Mayor Candidate

Joe

Attention! Now! 

About Joe

Age

3

Pawty Affiliation

The Stinky Pawty

Key Issues

  • Racism 
  • Homelessness 

I promise that everyone will have unlimited salami and roast beef (even if they’re not supposed to eat it) and be granted unlimited and undivided attention!


Joe – Mayoral Candidate for the Smalls Party

HOW I PLAN TO SOLVE KEY ISSUES

RACISM

HOMELESSNESS

HOMELESSNESS

I want to eliminate dog racism ... and assumptions. Everyone assumes I’m Mexican because I’m a Chihuahua. My shelter name was ... Pedro. Actually, I’m Texan. 

HOMELESSNESS

HOMELESSNESS

HOMELESSNESS

Every dog should have a home. Especially one with weird moms. 

I used to live in a box on the streets, but if you eat enough tin cans and have a weird looking adoption photo, some weird lesbians will adopt you to be their everything. I love Somerville now, especially all the LED signs.  

WHY YOU SHOULD VOTE FOR ME

The Most Important Question, Answered

You should vote for me as Somerville Dog Mayor because no one even applied for me when I was on the euthanasia list in Texas until my parents adopted me so I deserve MUCH more attention! 

Wanna Follow Me?

I love attention, but only in real life! No social media for me.

What Now?

I'm Ready TO VOTETAKE ME BACK TO FULL CANDIDATE LIST

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